Category Archives: family

Box Stores

Holly Doyne Posted on by  

Costco, IKEA, Target.

Probably three of the most frequently visited stores by parents of those setting up life at school or job in a new area of the country. We started with Target for some kitchen/bathroom needs, then moved on to Costco for anything that required volume (or discount). My son is practical. He can live without furniture but really wanted a decent vacuum cleaner. Our final stop on the run was IKEA (where we also found the second Costco which means that we did more driving than was absolutely necessary).

He now has a bed, some food in the kitchen, a kettle, a french press, cutting boards, knives, and a temporary desk so that he can get his computer set up.

Still on his list are tackling the rental agency about the cleaning that wasn’t done, getting his internet access, dropping off paperwork at school, grabbing his textbooks end of the week and otherwise settling in.

His location is good – 15 min walk from school. From the looks of the complex, there are a number in his age group. I am betting as well the tenants include house staff from the near by Jacobs Medical Center. Being across the street from a decent shopping center affords fast food and three grocery stores within reasonable walk (Vons, Ralph’s, Whole Foods). Oh, yes, Trader Joe’s as well.

We grabbed an early supper. I was more than interested in another nap. I am headed back to the Bay Area tomorrow, Noah flies back on Saturday for a week.

La Jolla

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as it turns out is home to University of California, San Diego, Go figure. Anyway – not San Diego State University which is a completely different institution.

We arrived on site in the early afternoon. Dealing with traffic on I-5 has seriously moved up on my list of “things that never need to be repeated in this life time.” The portion around San Diego isn’t that bad, but we had to get past L.A. and its sprawl before being able to relax at all. The only positive thing I can say about LA freeways is that they define HOV as 2 people in a vehicle.

20 minutes worth of frustration and fussing around finally liberated Noah’s apartment keys from the lock box. The one which was neither on the end of the row, nor marked with red tape. And, even better, there was an elevator from the garage up to the third level where he will be living. Helping with the first load or so, I proceeded to take a short nap while he finished unloading the car.

Not being up for much more (something about 4 hours total of sleep in the last 36+, we elected to find food and call it an early night.

Two places at once

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And it was back to UCSF this morning, followed by getting organized this afternoon. Probably the only thing at all easy about the day was the fact that the As are still out of town.

Otherwise, picked up a renta-beast (vehicle large enough to haul College Guy’s stuff including his desk chair) in preparation for tomorrow’s drive to San Diego. I left the packing to him, I went and took a nap. My first inclination had been to leave late this evening and stop somewhere along the drive. Reconsidering, I have elected to leave early in the morning and just drive through.

Early = about 0300 in the morning figuring that there isn’t going to be all the much traffic for the first 3-4 hours of the drive but having full daylight for the ugly portion (being LA and environs). Wisely, I had talked myself out of driving both ways, instead opting for the car and a flight back on Monday.

Another day, another drive

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Instead of driving to Parnassus (UCSF) this morning we had to head to UCSF Mission Bay. No biggie, right? Wrong. We were given an arrival time of 0715 which meant absolutely zero chance of adding a passenger to make use of the HOV lane. Instead, we wound up in that mess called “the Maze” where I-80, I-580 and other assorted freeway entrance ramps combine to approach the Bay Bridge Toll Plaza. Twelve minutes to get from home to the Maze (including the coffee stop). 35 minutes to get through the Maze and Toll Plaza, less than 15 after that to get to Mission Bay including getting off an exit too early.

As it turns out, the CV Center in Mission Bay doesn’t even open till 0730 so I have no clue as to why we were instructed to be there so early. The only advantage that I found was that lovely on street FREE parking spot about a block away. Of course, the meters don’t operate till 0900, but still. Free parking in SF? Totally amazing. I had never driven into Mission Bay before. I don’t get it. Two tiny bridges across the estuary. Tons of new buildings, densely packed. UCSF, Warriors Stadium, inadequate public transportation. Not an area which I would willingly visit or work in.

Tests went fine and we were home right about 0900 including a stop at Acme Bread for fresh Peach Puff Pastries. Yum. I spent most of the rest of the day with brain in idle. Watched part of the As manage to sneak past the Astro’s in Houston before they head to Arlington tomorrow. For the moment, they are actually ½ a game up in the Wild Card race.  Shana kindly volunteered to pick up Noah from the airport late tonight. Home for a day before we head to San Diego to get him set before school….

Tuesday – 41 years

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This is the only day this week that we don’t have to go to UCSF. I should be dancing around the house. Instead, what I really want to do is sleep. The days have been long, the nights pretty short; and I am feeling mildly guilty about whining since my exhaustion is nothing compared to what George is going through.

It is a day to get whatever possible done around the house – grocery shopping. laundry, sweeping the back porch.

However, we throughly enjoyed watching the As throughly trounce the Astros – in fact they did as good a job as the Astro’s did to us the previous night. Now – if the As continue on the same road – they will get at least as far as the Wild Card slot – and maybe a chance to play the Yankees again (who they have defeated 4:2 this season).

Probably the most significant thing to note – today is our 41st wedding anniversary. Reasonable number of years, I think. Covers Minnesota-Germany-DC-Germany-NY-DC-Germany-UK-Germany-California (with side detours for me into the Balkans, Korea, Kuwait, Iraq, Afghanistan) and multiple moves inside Germany. Also our four off-spring, multiple jobs, lots of travel, uncountable good times and memories.

It will be good to look back at this fall from next year, five years, ten years down the road. Knowing that we have survived yet another challenge.

I am planning on it.

Transfusions

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The trip across the Bay Bridge is becoming both extremely aggravating and boring. We have the routine down pretty well. Head out of the house, pick up lattes at Peet’s to make the ride bearable, swing by NB ride share to pick up a couple of passengers before heading to the freeway, the Bay Bridge and the SF side of the Bay.

Once again, George didn’t have much for blood, so it was platelets, two units of packed red cells  We didn’t even get on the road till 1830 so it, again, was a really long day. More so for him than me, but still. When the highlight of your day is pizza for lunch, you know you are in spinning-your-wheels-mode.

Add on top the As pitcher totally blowing up, resulting in the Astro’s wiping the As 15:0. Not fun. actually sad. And a testament to the fact that somedays, they just don’t have it.

 

 

Pussy Cat where have you been?

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Well, it certainly has not been to London, nor visiting a queen. This is as close to a queen as I have come

from a shop window

where she does the wave which I am sure is solar powered. The dogs (corgis?) wag their tails.

Most of the month it seems, I have been treading water – house hold chores, baseball, a bit of sewing, reading, a few puzzles, procrastinating (i.e. those papers are about at the 50% complete stage) and keeping an eye on George.

Unfortunately, starting last Thursday – that has turned into close to a full time job. We knew that his stem cell transplant had produced white cells, but not as many platelets or red cells as would have been expected to this point. An attempt to back down on the immune suppression didn’t help. His hemoglobin was way down and there was hardly a platelet to be found. That last is concerning, since platelets are ½ of the bodies clotting system. Clotting factors can do only so much without platelets to sort of plug up holes.

So Thursday he received necessary but unexpected transfusions and a request for a return visit on Saturday and Monday. Thursday evening he received a request to come back in on Friday which we managed. Then there was Saturday. And a request to come back on Sunday. (Dani pulled the Sat & Sunday drive). We did Monday, then Tues, then Wednesday which leads us to today. It has been platelets every day, plus more blood on both Saturday and yesterday.

The summary of which will be confirmed with a bone marrow biopsy tomorrow – but everyone is pretty sure that the stem cell transplant failed. Probably because he had a few white cells left which have managed to kill off the transplant. It could be that it just didn’t take. In any case, a couple of new donors have been potentially identified and are being screened.

Obviously, George is not thrilled and this drive is getting really, really old. Much harder on him than me since, instead of seeing restrictions lifted as we get close to the magic 100 days post transplant he has more treatment in the future.

 

Euclid->Keith->Shasta->Tamalpais->Rose->Euclid

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Off the hook today for the UCSF run (Daughter #2 did the honors) I took a dog for a walk after getting back home from my errands.

a treasure she found earlier in the week

Since there was no baby around – there was no candy involved either.

The above list is the route we wandered. Saroise was well behaved especially for her. But then, there was lots to sniff, a low traffic route and an absence of squirrels. Of note – on our street you see a variety of vehicles, a number of SUVs and more than the occasional pickup truck. In the hills above out house, it was much more upscale. Not only did one see a number of seriously large homes –

more like a European Estate

with renovation everywhere – but there were BMWs, Jags, Teslas, and the occasional high end Volvo. All of which made me glad that we are not located up these twisty little roads and have off street parking.

I went over to our Eldest’s for dinner which included a lovely backed

squash

the plant originally a gift from Alison.

What? No Platelets

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This morning, getting George’s lab results provided a nasty surprise. We knew that his red cells and platelets hadn’t come back the way that his oncologist was hoping. But being severely anemic again and essentially having no platelets circulating was not on the planned list of results.

The brief, short visit turned into hours as he received both platelets and packed, irradiated red blood cells.

And, if I haven’t said it before – my sincere thanks to all of you who are regular blood donors. It isn’t just the military, traffic accident victims and those caught in mass shootings who benefit from a healthy and robust blood supply. It is also those who are older, or under treatment for various malignancies who are kept alive during the course of treatment by the generosity of total strangers.

and we will have to be back tomorrow. Probably Saturday and Sunday as well.

Oh, joy.

Lighten Up

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glow in the dark –

and that is dog as well as flamingos. Dani says it isn’t really a harness – just LED bands that continually change color which is a really good idea when your dog is rather hard to see in the dark. Unlike the flamingos – it doesn’t take solar energy to activate her brightness.

and I added McBeth to the t-shirts completed so far –

aka – literature

Less than an hour

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My skin normally starts to crawl when I even think of facing the traffic into San Francisco from my side of the Bay. Since this is Thursday, George has an appointment at UCSF.

Taking a deep breath, I made an early run to fill the gas tank. Trust me, the very last thing I want to do is run out of fuel on the Bay Bridge and become “one of those idiots” who impact traffic with their rudeness. I think you understand. So, full tank of gas (petrol) followed by a coffee stop at Peet’s for human trip fuel before heading back to the house to grab my passengers. Since Alex had to make a run into the city today, I had the three of us–the magic number for the HOV lane. Rather than committing myself to having to get off at the Fremont Exit, I skipped picking up a fourth passenger at the North Berkeley Ride Share and just headed out.

My least favorite part of the trip, if one could say that any portion of the trip was all right, is having to work my way across five lanes of traffic to get to the HOV lane from the University Avenue entrance. Three of those lanes are Oakland bound and they are by far denser than the right lanes. And, hello – this is California where a turn-signal doesn’t seem to mean much of anything. I can actually be appreciative of large trucks, they never ride the bumper of the vehicle in front of them so there is usually space that I can squeeze into.

Once we hit the HOV lane, it was clear sailing all the way to the San Francisco side of the Bay Bridge. Even the traffic up Olivia wasn’t that bad. All in all, we were at UCSF in less than an hour from leaving home, an unheard of fast trip for rush hour. George is stable, getting a bit stronger everyday. It would be really nice if his red blood cells and platelets were recovering as fast as his white cells, but I guess we don’t get to have everything. He has been shifted to weekly visits from twice a week, so that is excellent from my point of view.

After we returned home, I spent the afternoon organizing my studio a bit more and machine embroidering lace doilies, just because I could. And, they are pretty mindless with few, if any, color changes.

large and small

Spinning in circles

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and no, this is not a discussion about spinning wheels. Perhaps something on that a later day.

Instead, this is more about my complete lack of being able to get much of anything done for the last several weeks (other than taking George in and back to appointments), doing some basic house work, taking out trash, running loads of laundry. When a major bit of excitement is a trip to the grocery store.

We are alive, he is getting better every day. But it is a slog.

Skunk

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I am not sure why a skunk wanted to live in our neighborhood. It is not car free, people free, other animal free. But apparently this particular skunk has been hanging out down the back hill from our house for the past several years. I saw it a couple of times on the stairs and gave her a wide berth.

Unfortunately, that skunk decided to chitter at one of Dani’s dogs. A German short-hair pointer, she doesn’t have much of a sense of humor about being scolded by an animal she thinks of as pray. Alex had the dog on the leash, the skunk scolded, the dog took off.

It was a draw – the dog got the skunk, but not before being sprayed.

It is a day or so later. The dog has been bathed, groomed and both upstairs and downstairs have been aired out several times. There is still a definite whiff of skunk in the air.

We are not amused.

Her garden grows

Holly Doyne Posted on by  

a while back, Alison gave me this small squash plant in a pot.

Since the chance of me doing any gardening are less than zero, it went to live at the Eldest’s house. She gardens. She has raised beds. And, most importantly, she loves fresh veggies grown in her garden. Carefully transferred from pot to bed, provided love and water, it has taken off…and is living happily with her other plants

And not a flamingo

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Inspecting the invader

The Eldest is amused, but not enthralled by my flamingoes. She has an extensive side garden but has given me the evil eye when ever I have suggested “improvements.” Apparently, our tastes don’t exactly match. She is also the cat mom to Onyx and Ghost. When I saw this particular item while flamingo shopping, I just couldn’t resist.

Passing both the sniff and taste test (Cat Scan), I still don’t think this particular solar beastie will stay in the house.

Otherwise, I added a bit of color to my sewing area while planning my next embroidery projects.

except that it is!

home for four weeks

Holly Doyne Posted on by  

which means 6 weeks post stem cell transplant.

George is doing better each day. The traffic into the city. wasn’t all that bad. His blood work was all stable which means we completely avoided having to hang out for any transfusions. I survived the battles with Wahlgreens (local pharmacy put one of his meds in as a routine refill and didn’t call the supplier. The tech was disgusted – said the pharmacist both should have called and has to be the one that calls – to take something out of the routine drop ship so that it is expedited. As a result, I made a detour to the same chain across the street from UCSF who, of course, carries this particular med in stock. Makes sense since I think they have 1-3 patients a day going home on it.

A detour through Heath Ceramics on the way home netted me a couple of thirds and a creamer/sugar bowl set of seconds.

Then I worked on clearing out more in the sewing room, actually found the iron (don’t tell anyone that), planned the next “kids” quilt and watched the Twins-As game. Which the Twins won by dint of more home runs than I wanted to see….

Missing my kitchen fairy

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some how, in my willingness to ship off Engineer Guy to six weeks of internship in Connecticut, I forgot an import point. One of his main contributions to the household since returning from school in San Diego has been taking over most of the routine household tasks. Those simple but annoying things. He was taking out the garbage (this is California – recycling here requires sorting), 90% of the cooking and, most importantly, cleaning the kitchen.

He caught a flight on Saturday, spent the weekend with his sister in New York, then caught a train on Monday morning. Happily back working  But not here. So there I am, washing dishes, loading and unloading the dishwasher, and taking out garbage, trash, and watering the lemon tree.

(whine, whine, whine)

Yesterday I worked on sorting out and cleaning the studio/sewing room/storage area while the Eldest did some sewing. I had been thinking about doing a bit more today, but abandoned the idea in favor of heading to the Coliseum to watch the As wipe the Mariners off the map and out of the park. Our pitcher was, frankly, not great. Theirs we’re worse. Two of the As clobbered  a pair of home runs each. End result? 10:2 with 10:8 as far as hits. And, amazingly enough, no errors on either side. For the fans listening on the radio – RF149’s apologies for the lack of drummers. Four cowbells and a woodblock just can’t carry the same level of sound.

Number 71

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It wasn’t all that exciting a birthday for George. He had what turned out to be an all day appointment including a transfusion at UCSF. He was pretty wiped out by the time we got home. Since he is still restricted to home (except for those clinic visits) we didn’t have many options for celebrating. A couple of friends joined us for dinner (which the Eldest and Engineer Guy created).

We didn’t sign happy birthday, but there was homemade cheesecake.

 

Today it is trains

Holly Doyne Posted on by 4

My mind is blank, or rather, I am drawing a blank when trying to figure out whether or not I accomplished anything todayNo trip into SF.

No knitting. But dishes.

Errands – oh, right – Post Office – mailing out packages to Georgia and Ohio. Picking up pizza and fresh fruit at the grocery store. Driving to Richmond to pick up one son and getting backing fabric for the little girls quilt.

Otherwise? Trains –

the program list on the sewing machine

which

looks like this in progress

and winds up being a series of train cars –

along with the engine

on hand towels for a young man who keeps informing everyone that he “is the engineer.”

Driving in a bubble

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The time was 0930 in the morning and we had left the house on the way to UCSF. The HOV lanes were still active so after making a kamikaze series of four lane changes to the left, we sailed along to the left sided flyover headed toward the Bay Bridge. There isn’t all that much traffic in the left lane, made even less by those single drivers smart enough to get out of the HOV lane before the cameras documents their law breaking activity. From there the flyover lane crosses to the right side and meets up with the HOV lane coming from the Oakland direction. Sailing through the toll plaza, we entered the main portion of the traffic just past the metering lights. To our left, and ahead of us was a small, reddish Fiat. There was no one around the Fiat by 10 meters or so in any direction. In a location where traffic was almost bumper to bumper, there was this bubble of “no drive” around the Fiat.

From there, all the way across the bridge, no matter the speed for the rest of the traffic, this Fiat seemed to travel at a slow and constant speed with everyone avoiding it. Traffic going 40? The Fiat is going 30 and everyone passes it. Traffic going 20? The Fiat continues to sail along with everyone avoiding it. Admittedly, I didn’t see much with it traveling faster than everyone around it. More like it turtling along with every single last car, truck and motorcycle avoiding getting anywhere near the Fiat.

When last seen, it was puttering south on the freeway, its bubble space still intact.

Arriving at UCSF early, George had his labs drawn and his follow up appointment. From there it didn’t run as smoothly as I would have liked. Because his feet hurt, someone hadn’t been drinking enough fluids. Not drinking fluids puts one’s kidneys at risk. Instead of heading home, we wound up spending almost an additional  four hours while someone (fill in the name yourself) received a significant amount of IV hydration.

The drive home was painful as the afternoon rush traffic had already started. My afternoon errands had been completely and totally taken over by hanging out at UCSF while someone’s IV went drip, drip, drip. Taking a deep breath here and releasing the last of the pent up anger, frustration and general disgust….

But the next time someone doesn’t drink enough on his own – he can Lyft or Uber home….