A short but serious discussion

For those of you who are news junkies – you already know that todays total of cases was approaching 300,000+ and a death toll close to 12000 as of 1500GMT. Yes, from now on, I will use GMT. It is just easier and I know that everyone  will convert to their own time zone (well, except for Mary, Anita, and Beverly who are ON GMT). In most countries, we have not yet hit epidemic peaks, much less transitioned into a more easily monitored recovery phase.

I am ashamed to admit there are still those in the US so tied up in politics and conspiracy theories that they are doubting the epidemic is real. As the old saying goes:

You can’t regulate common sense

and you can’t cure stupid.

I am not sure what leaves individuals so secure in their own little bubble that they totally ignore health, safety, responsibility, and a reasonable duty to others.

and – for common sense and clear explanation of basics – I direct you to Pat’s most recent post

So what is my serious discussion?

Personal affairs. Now, if you are over a certain magic age which I will, for the short term peg at retirement, you have probably at one time or another done things like catalog property, make a will, and think about who is responsible for what – should you become incapable of managing your affairs. But maybe not. Or perhaps you haven’t relooked at the paperwork for a number of years.

Folks, it is time to revisit and revise. It isn’t just the major bits: physical property such as real estate and vehicles, bank accounts, retirement accounts, off-site storage, bank boxes, recurring bills…..It is the little things as well: pets, treasures and that all important “STUFF.” For all of us with crafts or hobbies, exactly what do you want to happen to your stash?

Over the last several years, when talking to various seniors (senior? no, not me in this instance), I have heard repeatedly “my family/daughter/children/spouse” will take care of things.Think about it–is that really fair? To not leave any instructions? To potentially set up conflict? To dumb an unholy mess on those who already have enough on their plates with grief?

California law is relatively easy: several years ago, George and I set up a living family trust and transferred just about everything into it, excepting our USAA accounts (Texas is its own little world). Since we are nowhere near the eight digit limit of value, this completely avoids probate. Both a legally good and cost saving measure. We also executed living wills and medical power of attorneys.

George has tons of books and vinyl. I have stash, in the form of fabric, fiber, and all the assorted supplies that go along with sewing, quilting, knitting, spinning, cross-stitch etc. Do we care what happens to any of it? Well, actually yes. The relevant historical books will go to the Magnus Museum. Several years ago, I donated a loom and a large number of weaving supplies to a lovely woman who teaches weaving in an improvised Mexican area (where she grew up). But the rest of it? Do I care? Hummmm… Certainly we are extremely limited on family heirlooms, antiques or collectables. And, it seems like “stuff” counts more than anything that could be even remotely considered valuable.

Take the time you have now been gifted to get your personal affairs organized. If you care who gets your “stuff” at least do the courtesy of making a list. It might not be legally binding but it should help. This is not the time to nourish those festering arguments that have been going on for years; forgive, even if you can’t forget.

What you don’t want is the comment said by many after the World Trade Center destruction in 2001 – “I never got a chance to say “I love you.” “I never got a chance to say goodbye.”

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About Holly

fiber person - knitter, spinner, weaver who spent 33 years being a military officer to fund the above. And home. And family. Sewing and quilting projects are also in the stash. After living again in Heidelberg after retiring (finally) from the U.S. Army May 2011, we moved to the US ~ Dec 2015. Something about being over 65 and access to health care. It also might have had to do with finding a buyer for our house. Allegedly this will provide me a home base in the same country as our four adult children, all of whom I adore, so that I can drive them totally insane. Considerations of time to knit down the stash…(right, and if you believe that…) and spin and .... There is now actually enough time to do a bit of consulting, editing. Even more amazing - we have only one household again. As long as everyone understands that I still, 40 years into our marriage, don't do kitchens or bathrooms. For that matter, not being a golden retriever, I don't do slippers or newspapers either. I don’t miss either the military or full-time clinical practice. Limiting my public health/travel med/consulting and lecturing to “when I feel like it” has let me happily spend my pension cruising, stash enhancing (oops), arguing with the DH about where we are going to travel next and book buying. Life is good!
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One Response to A short but serious discussion

  1. Cat says:

    Couldn’t agree more. The Senior Cat has made it clear that the contents of the workshop go to my brother because he will go on using them. That’s a major relief to all of us. There is still “stuff” here which belonged to my mother. As I come across it in the long slow clean out I have to ask the others “do you want it?” and then,because we almost always don’t, “What do we do with it?”
    I am going to use some of this time to sort,stash,toss and then list with instructions – well that’s the intention anyway!

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